One of the most dangerous things you can do when considering divorce is to accept the random advice offered to you by family, friends, co-workers and even acquaintances on the internet.
Divorce is like pregnancy in that an individual is often subject to constant bombardment with unwanted advice if people know about their circumstances. Additionally, like pregnancy, divorce often involves what seems like endless waiting, as there is no way to speed up either process.
If you want to file for divorce or have recently filed, you need to make sure that you don’t believe any of the most common misconceptions.
Moving out of the house means that you lose the house
It is impossible to know how many people stay in an untenable social situation because they believe that moving out will affect their legal rights. Although a judge may look at who moved out and who stayed when temporarily awarding possession of the residence, the person staying in the home isn’t what really matters in the property division process.
Under Delaware family law, the equity in a marital home is likely subject to division. Even if one spouse stays there, the other will receive money from a refinance mortgage or other marital assets of similar value. After all, you’ve used marital assets to pay for and maintain the home, and the law about property division instructs the judge to be fair.
Judges are biased against one parent or the other for custody purposes
One of the divorce myths that just won’t die is the idea that judges have a sex-based bias against one parent or the other. Truthfully, the custody laws don’t refer to either father or mother.
They instead expect that judges will focus on what is best for the children, which often leads to a presumption of shared custody. A parent requesting sole custody will usually need a good reason for making that request unless their ex doesn’t want to assert their parental rights.
Divorce can cost more than a wedding
Divorce can be expensive, just like getting married. However, as with a wedding, you and your spouse make the decisions that determine how much it costs.
You can choose to work together through collaborative law or mediation to file an uncontested divorce, or you can choose to litigate. The circumstances surrounding your divorce and the assets you have will inform which approach is better for you.
Even if you have to pursue a more expensive path to divorce, that money is an investment in your future independence and happiness.